Sometimes i Should have Shut up...

self-reflect
self-reflect
self-reflect
self-reflect
self-reflect
self-reflect
self-reflect
...
This is the conclusion:
...
I've always thought :
"Yes i'm close to perfect!"
perfect to???
Being a good friend,
being a good son,
Most importantly being a
near-to-perfect boyfriend (:
But i was wrong.

My baby never wanted me to
be a near-to-perfect,
i chose to be one myself.
She gave me her everything,
everything except for bad things.
She only gives me all the best (:
So in return i wanna be someone,
someone special to her.
Someone whom she can rely on,
whom she can trust on,
rest on,
love on
and believe on..
But instead of closer to being
someone SPECIAL i became someone
SUCKY.

i've nothing to complaint,
but everything to be happy about.
i've could have never ask for anything else.
If i could re-live any day again,
i would choose 28/02/2008.
if i could re-choose a galfren,
i would still choose you.
if i'm only left with one last breath,
i'm gonna keep it for you,
to say "i love you" .
I never find dying for anione so meaningful
except for you.
I'm happy my mind's all about you everyday,
as joey says:
"it's always jess,jess,jess,jess..."
hahas, it's always you baby (:
Never regretted since the day i started wit you,
if it does end i will never ever regret (:

You're More than Just You (:
Believe in yourself,
Never limit yourself.
I'm sorry i cant be a resting place for you.
But i'm always here if you need me (:
I Love you like nothing else on this Earth.
Now i can sefely say...
I dont expect anything from you..
Not animore..
Do as you will (:

Sorry it took me this long to realize
wad was written in ur blog.
Dont worry about me anymore.
I'm grown up le.
If you need solitude,
just tell me alrite baby? (:
I wont grow around EMO and
think so much animore (:
I'm grown up...
And it's time i grow up.


-your undying care & love runs deep in my heart-

Things are hooking up.

If anyone reading sees my darling
as a,
"bad" girl.
let tell you..

!!YOU'RE WRONG!!

The loving touches she's given me,
SHE SAYANG-ed MY HEART TODAY!!
i suddenly feel so much lighter.
she's my only baby...
i dont wish to lose her...

sobs*

Aniways things are starting to get better,
in terms of me & her.
The rest are still as fustrating as ever.
Rahhhhhh~!!!!!!!

i hope after tonite's sleep will be better (:

Love lik Heaven,Hurts lik Hell

Seriously speaking,
If i could have fallen asleep,
i would have just done so.
I'm totally moodless and feeling
literally,
"heartless"
But thinking back i'm so sure,
tht i've gt a heart.
why???
Coz it has been weighing for lik,
few 100 tons for half of today.
I can hardly feel myself breathing,
my chest is so heavy and tight that
i feel lik juz jumping dwn from
anyplace would be a better feeling.
Unexplainable Pain,
it's really really painful.

On one hand,
My baby...
Am i really such a person to you??
No sense of urgency,
No sense of time,
No Respect to even those tht had passed on??
Am i lik that??
It's been very painful all along...
i dont care,
i tahan...
Yes i'm a GUY,
Insensitive,
Always Late,
Over-playful,
etc etc.
There was so many times i wanna
breakdown and cry..
i cant..
When i always think back about
you,
i remembered..
How ur ex treated ue..
How thy made ue so upset..
How thy rob ue of ur joy..
How thy betray ur trust..
How thy hurt ue lik hell..
& i'll always rmb my promise
and tell myself,
i'm not gonna be lik them.
i'm gonna make you happy,
i'm gonna let u trust once more,
i'm gonna love you lik heaven.
Sometimes even you did things lik,
kup phne,
talk to me in aggressive manner,
shunt me a cold shoulder,
i didnt really lik em..
in fact i hate em..
the reason i nv said a word was becoz,
i wanna proof to you,
not all guys are the same.
i wanna proof to you,
i really love you lik nobody's buisness..
i really do...
The fact tht i'm writing all these
down are not for sympathys,
not for forgiveness,
not for pride nor glory.
i write it down is becoz i want YOU,
to know i really do love you.

Yes,the most hurtful of hurts cmes frm you.
(and u always hurt me by accident)
But the best of the loves cmes frm you too!

fer nw i guessed tht's most of the thing,
dont wanna slp 1st...
wait fer Darling call see if she wants me
pei her to jurong.

i hope darling will feel better after a slp.

-Failing as ever,the Failure,MK.-

Shooting Star That You Can Safely Say Your's (:

Let's kick off today by...
Happy 3rd Month BABY!!

Days has been flying pass really quickly,
Been through lots of emotions for the past
3 months.
High tides & Low tides as well.
We've teared Together,
And had been enjoying fun & laughters
Together.
Time had been hard on us,
Pockets Bombed,
Problems sprouting out from nowhre
and growing real quick lik nobody's
buisness.
But we've stood through together,
And here we are still alive today =x

On this special day,
i would like to say..
I'm proud of my baby ,
for her intensive care for me,
her undying love for me,
her warmth tht touches my heart,
her thoughts & sacrifices made..
Just for me.
And i wanna say tht,
Thnxs baby,
i appreciate your love,
and i will cherish you (:

Blogskin was re-themed,
For you Baby. (:
I'm not just your shooting star
on special days.
I'm a shooting star where
will be there whn u call,
always fly pass to tke away those
tears,
to cheer you up,
...
i'm a shooting star in which ue can
safely call "yours".
...
I love you baby!!

Today's been sought of great!!
Darling Suprised bout the necklace!
Yay!!
And a lovely rose from me to her :P
Was supposed to go woodlands town garden,
but the weather wasnt vry freny so..
Forced to think of smehting else.
Aniways we came up with idea of
Renting Movies and buy sme snacks and drink
up to my house and enjoy!
It came out great of coz,
can hugg my beloved ddear while watching a
great movie "Storm the Yard".
Hahas we did enjoyed the movie and all,
Hopefully tomorow would be Nice too!
Oh yar...
Did i mentioned i did the honour of
wearing the necklace for her in the middle
of the road and rain !!
Romantic level i dont think it did
reached the expected level,
maybe i shld improve on tht.
haiz..
But i gotta say,
THe necklace looked great on her!

Other thn that.
here are some of the future plans,
-fitness training intensive.
-tkd self training.
-settle out any unsettled scores.
-settle out $$$ problems.

Well...
I guessed tht's all about it.
Update tmr for sure XP
cya guys!!

Revival of Blog (: *with opening regarding blogskin*

Hey guys,
yea i knw my blog had been dead fer quite awhile but worry not,
Here's smething fresh (:

1stly,if u have been an active blog reader of mine,
you would probably have notice tht i've actually changed my skin.
And i change them very often (:

For now my skin had been newly updated*
This guy over here,
Uchiha Itachi.
From the Anime "Naruto" if u did watch,
you will knw tht he's a "bad-guy" and very unpredictable,strong guy.
And LOTS of Naruto Fans are totally crazy over him.(girls tht is)
Well i'm a guy, thn y did i use him on my blog?!
simple. coz i respect him.
For crazy chaser of Naruto you will know tht he is actually FORCED,
to be bad guy.
And the fact tht at a point in which he was dying he still thinks of he's
younger brother,
Uchiha Sasuke.
Who only seeks revenge on Itachi,his brother.
The background story was complicating.
But my point here is tht,
I'm really trying hard to be lik him.
To my younger brother,
and to my 3 other blood brothers.
Just hope tht thy'll understnd (:

Aniways Lots of things had been happening,
stressing,loving,tiring and definitely intresting!

Between my brotherhood,
my younger brother is still not as understnding as ever..
well now he's trying to jio a gal but of coz,
definitely wishing fer his success and hopefully,
the gal will make him a mature young man.

Thn move on to my blood bro's eldest,
Well let's just put it tht he's been fooling around,
can see he WAS enjoying.
But now he's sought of in deep shiit.
Everyone else is trying really hard to help him though.
Just hopes tht he pulls through this and stop
he's childishness.
And he got himself a galfren!!
Grattz! (:
Better last long..

Well,2nd bro.
Stucked in the middle like me.
Somehw the case where the eldest was in,
he's in the middle of it.(die lor)
and so am i...
hope things been goin well between him and Lyn.
Last Long ohs (: stay sweet !

4th bro...
Wah this one jialat...
Mindset is of totally primary school.
childish thoughts,uncontrollable temper.
BUT,
of coz u're not forgotten and looked down on.
Everyone regconize you,
everyone remembers you.
Stop having childish thoughts like :
"Destiny cant be changed"
Put it this way,
A guy takes a parang and runs after you,
of coz you run!!
By doing tht it changes ur so called destiny to die.
i knw u'll say tht's bullshit.
iIf you stnd there,
tht's it u're dead.
isnt it???
Same goes for ur life,
People say :
"if your time is up , you'll die means you'll die."
But for you now,
You haven even reach tht time,
but you're WAITING for that time.
I wish for all the best in your life,
and definitely wish tht your princess will come soon.
forget to mention ur good point is that,
you've meant well for everything u say.
just use your words well and things are gonna be fine (:
"ni de hao yi wo xing ling le"

Overall is till wishes for my brotherhood to Last with wider smiles!

Hahs,
Now blogging on my Darling,Ddear,Baby,Honey,Dear,Beautiful,Beloved. (:
In between such a long time never blog,
definitely there's misunderstnding and stresses along this period.
Cant really remember those bad things tht happens,
Mostly are small matters like,
stressing over camp,
over job,
over her exams.etc.
Just simple stuffs lik tht (:
But we're both of extremely sensitive kinda ppl,
So...
Minors can easily becme a Major problem.
it's been a really stressing period for her.
She's got her O's,
got her sisters' to look after,
got her gan-family,
defintiely her own probs and all,
BUT..she will ALWAYS tke out time for me.
(except smetimes boh bian)
So on today's blog gonna Thxs her loads!
Gotta cheers honey!!
worry not, i'll always be here to tickle you!!
And Ddear,
i do appreciate of wad u hav done,sacrificed and given up for me.
thanks baby!! x333 MUACKS!! Loves you !!Looking forward to 28th !!!!!!!
Rawr~

Moving on to the Greatest stress i'm having now,
to choose between being a christian or buddhist.
Actually i aso cant say much.
Let's juz say that it's unbelievable,
or i'm juz thinkin too much.
Been asking myself recently,
Wad is the answer tht i need,
wad is it.??
i constantly ask myself of this question.
And this is the "unbelievable" or "think too much".
i will suddenly hear the singing of this phrase outta knw where,
"Jesus is the answer,for the world today."
"Above him there's no others,Jesus is the way."
Chua tio lei !!
Everytime outta nowhere de !!

well,other thn this,
i find myself gettin along well with jeannie and lot.
of feeling more comfortable goin to church.
THings lik dat.
Haiz...
Well i guess tht's all about it. (:

will blog soon (:
Most prob would be dead again i tink (;

Friday 9th May 08 East Coast.

[Requested post] by:Darling.

Friday Was The Day Of Fun For:
Joey,CHeeHwee,Clara,Ddear Jessica Espcially.
We went to East Coast after Ddear Went for her "Tui Na".
Thn We all Head Dwn to East Coast Together (:

Once we reach there We Rent Bike ^^
4 bikes,5 persons (:
1st time taking Ddear for a ride on a bicycle!!.
She Praised My skill !! Compared to smebody's ...
Yea Aniways she totally Enjoyed Herself Tht Day.

Considering She Threw Smething (burden),
Into The Sea.Leaving it behind forever.
Plus , Seeing her Riding a Bike lik she nv ride b4...
feel really happy for her.
Finally this little canary Has Freed from
a Bastard's Cluthes...
Into Freedom..

To Hell of ur Past,
TOwards Heaven is ur future.
stay cheerful my darling!!
I still remembered i promise you,
we'll enjoy your new freedom together !
with me helping you fufill (:
I love you honey!!

Hmmm...Few picts was taken On tht day.
Aniways Here it is.











So That's Abt it.
Nothin Bout Chee & Joey Coz thy dont want Co-operate in Pictures :P
Next time thn (:
ByeBye~!!

Today's Mother's Day!!

Let's start off by today.
Today is MOTHER'S DAY!!
May All Mothers WANSUI!!
MY OWN MOTHER WANSUI³!!!

Today's morning was in CHC with Dear.
Touching Moments of hw sme Mother's Hav Impact & Touched
thier Dear children's life.

Of coz i Do love my mum!!
But Our family has gt no tradition of saying em' Out.
So well... I went home and did greet her With a
Happy Mother's Day wishing (:
Too budget nowadays To even gt smething for my Mum.
Aniways still,
Spent My Afternoon With Darling Too.
Had Lunch together in MAC.
Hahas she quite happy coz she hasnt lay her hands on
Fast food fer a month le.

Aniways Today at Church Me & Darling...well..
Let's Just put it,We got Shot.
"Couples That Prays Together,Stays Together"
I'll Leave that to YOU readers to think abt it coz
i'm done fredding over it luh...
hmmmm...stress stress...

Well...
My Brother "Ming Hui" .
Didnt even bother to eat dinner together with my Mum Today!!
MOTHER's DAY!!
And his Reason was..
"I Need To Chiong Maple Lahs!!"
Great..Fine..Nthn to say.
Thn Later On wan go out.
Wan tke money frm my mother and father.
Thy dont give, THn my bro scold scold scold..
Scold until they give him de money liaos...
Thn ran off..

Thxs ah Younger Brother, U really let Mum Enjoy her Day yar (:

Aniways ,
Welcoming 3 Brothers into my life.
: Joey,Chee Hwee, Munkit.
We Are No longer Best Of frens...
Now We are Brothers!
Blood Brothers!!
May Our BrotherHood Last.
CHEERS!!

Swae THings That Happen Recently:
*Constant Quarrels With Brothers & Darling.
*Financial Crisis.(self & family)
*Bike Got Stolen.
*Got Chased Money By Ah Long (Chee Hwee)
So Far that's all bahs...

If i rmb i'll Update.
Of coz there's Lots of Other Events Happened since i last updated.
My Fingers Are Strssed up and definitely Feeling Empty up in dhe head.
As in No inspirations to blog.
Well Of coz nt totally empty coz ddear's constantly in my mind! (:

Gonna Do smething abt myself,myself,& Myself.

I hope i can Let her smile from her heart once again..
Let her Sees it...With her Heart <3
Loves Ddear!! x333

Touched...Trapped...Tearing...

Today i went to City Harvest Church (:
Being there just dont seem so awkward animore,
Been learning alot from there,
Made new friends in this process ^^
People were really friendly to me,
Great Thxs to them!!

Aniways i got a feeling that..
"Somebody" is hinting me..
Showing me signs,happenings,
and all..
Just telling me y'knw,
asking me into His family.
And i got "Something" ,more lik "helper",
Telling me smebody has been praying really hard for me ohs!!
Who else will pray for me everyday?
who else will shed tears just for me every day?
I'm so lucky to have a girlfren lik you (:
Couldn't hav been any better.
Thank You Dear!! x333

Recently having thoughts of converting,
quite a serious decision to make...
Well...i'm gonna put it on hold.
It's nothing to really wreak my brain on actually...
When it's de right time the fruit will blossom.
Let's see how it goes luh...

Aniways i'm a buddhist...
Ya i knw...whu say cant convert??
i knw can..
Plus got motivating stories from Pastors and Mentors
from the church .
They told of their life,
Hw thy became a christian and all...
Plus Plus there were a number in church were
converted from buddhist.
Mainly my parents aso dun really allow me
to convert...
Stressing topic too...

Aniways things hasnt really been smooth...
Doubt it's either of us de fault...
I'm gonna stop this habit of taking all the blame to myself,
And i hope ddear can too.
"in a relationship NoOne's at faults. It's either none or BOTH"
We're growing to knw more about each other,
more loving definitely.
But,things werent goin on so smoothly partly is
me being Over-sensitive .
I think it's just becoz of this.
Give me time dear i'm sure i can change it (:
i'm sure u'll always be by my side.

"a broken relationship takes months to heal,suggested nt to go into relationship if not fully healed."

Maybe we did started of abit earlier,on shaky rocks,bad timing...
But my darling's holding on!
Even after 2 huge blows one after another...
For me,
She pushed to the limit...
For us...

So darling,
Thxs fer putting all ur trust,
all ur time,
all ur love on me.
I knw u still need more time,rest assured i'll be waiting for
as long as i can.
Even if miracles does nt happen,
i will make it happen...
Just for you Honey...
Just for you.

Brothers 4 Life,Blood Brothers.
GOnna becme Blood bro with my all time Best buddies!
Chee Hwee,Mun Kit,Joey.
Looking forward to that (:

Aniways as for myself,
I started a little training CLass for Tkd.
Members : Zuohao,Chee,Munkit

Than i'm gonna begin my intensive training for
*purely self defense purpose ONLY!
And of coz to be fit (:

And Darling will b busy with her studies...
It's O's this yr!!
Work Hard DARLING!!
MUACKS!!
*May my kisses be with You*

~END~